Tuesday, September 14, 2010

"Factoid" Is Fun To Say

Here's 10 facts that are very important for you to know. Why they don't teach this stuff in schools in beyond me.

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FACT 1

The term rule of thumb comes from the old English law that men couldn't beat their wives with anything wider than their thumb.

Why It Matters

America! America! Down with the redcoats!

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FACT 2

Ants never sleep.

Why It Matters

Makes all the merciless ant slaughters we participated in as children seem less demonic, somehow.

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FACT 3

American poet Edgar Allan Poe was once thrown out of West Point Academy in 1831 after showing up for inspection stark naked.

Why It Matters

You have no idea how badly I want to make a joke that includes the phrase, "Standing At Attention".

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FACT 4

Tommy Lee Jones and Al Gore were freshman roommates at Harvard.

Why It Matters


If you go to Harvard, you have a 50% chance of starring in a movie with Will Smith.

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FACT 5

Months that begin on a Sunday will always have a "Friday the 13th."

Why It Matters

It's a good way to remind yourself that Jason is coming into town, and if you have any friends of high school age that like to wander off alone, now's the time to call dibs on their stuff.

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FACT 6

The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

Why It Matters

I don't know anyone named Mohammed.

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FACT 7

A polar bear's skin is black. Its fur is not white, but actually clear.

Why It Matters

It confuses the hell out of white supremacists.

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FACT 8


Experts at Intel say that microprocessor speed will double every 18 months for at least 10 years.

Why It Matters

It doesn't.

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FACT 9

Hitler and Napoleon both had only one testicle.

Why It Matters

Because deep down, you've always wondered.

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FACT 10

Celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.

Why It Matters

Q: If an obese man in a forest eats a piece of celery, and nobody is around to see him eat it, and it doesn't have any calories, is he still obese?

A: Of course not.

Q: Really?

A: No.

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~~JUSTIN~~

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